Team Extreme at Assateague

We’ve returned from the annual camping trip to Assateague National Seashore and I can report that the bathrooms are getting better and the mosquitoes are getting worse. Everything else is as good as ever. The biggest change this year turned out to be that we arranged meals with our carpools rather than as one massive group of 30 (or one year 80) hungry campers. That had to be easier on trip organizers Jamie and Krista, and it was perfect for the Saturday bike riders because we missed breakfast and lunch last year anyway. It did mean, at least in our case, that you spent more time with your carpool than the full group. Hence as you can tell from the photos it was the weekend of Jon, Sara and Darren… not that there’s anything wrong with that.

Highlights included spending Friday night at Ocean City which Darren and I had last visited in 1994. We found Hooper’s Crab House which has a $28 all-you-can-eat crab/shrimp/chicken dinner. This was the exact same place we had eaten 14 years ago… except that from a newspaper clipping on the wall we learned that it had completely burned down and been rebuilt in that time!

On Saturday a group of us set out on various bike rides around the lovely town of Berlin (which has a billboard advertising that it was the town where Julia Roberts and Richard Gere filmed Runaway Bride). I did the same 30 mile loop as last year (though I felt considerably faster) but I definitely have some serious riding to do to get ready for my first Century in September. Gulp. I am sure I can ride the 100 miles though if it is followed by a meal at Saturday’s lunch spot Rayne’s Reef (aka The Falcon Diner in Runaway Bride). You can’t beat a post-ride burger and milkshake at this establishment in the heart of Berlin. Too bad my century finishes hundreds of miles away from there…

Saturday afternoon it was back to the beach for some sun, sand, and small-court volleyball. We’d forgotten to pack the volleyball net that Joel recently left with us but another group had set one up and Sara, Darren and I decided to crash their court. It made for a memorable afternoon. The net belonged to a group of hilarious Marines from Philly who dubbed themselves “Team Extreme”. Team Extreme sported torso-covering tattoos and invented force-of-nature names for their serves. While attempting some sort of arm/chest roll they would warn us to “Beware the Hurricane!” (sometimes they called the exact same move “The Tornado”). Other times they pantomimed drizzling lava on the ball. Of course we had secret-weapon Sara who combined her sizzling softball serve with a blue bikini that proved far more distracting to the Marines than any of their natural disaster antics did to us. Although we won all but the first game it was more about having fun than playing volleyball and we definitely accomplished that. After all you have to understand that the court was about one-quarter regulation size and it was necessary to engage in a lengthy discussion with Team Extreme to reach agreement that a team would only be allowed three hits per side…

Notes to Jon:

• Wear Aqua socks when playing sand volleyball. I survived Team Extreme’s serves but thought I broke my big toe by slamming it into Darren’s heel. I guess I could also try to improve my “periphial” vision.
• Cambridge is the town that has the shopping center we always stop at with a Food Lion, Liquor store, and Taco Bell/KFC.
• The waitress at Hooper's made my weekend by delivering a basket of what she called condiments, which included (drumroll please) BUTTER! You of course have to understand that Darren, Sara and I have had ongoing debates over the past month regarding the question “Is butter a condiment?”. Resolved that butter can be a condiment!
• The joys of condimentary butter aside, I prefer crab dipped in vinegar.
  
• Don’t be suckered in by the heaping plate of corn, hush puppies, chicken and ribs that is first delivered to the table, they are just trying to fill you up so you won’t eat as many of the delicious shrimp and crabs!
• The port-o-potty and wooden shower stalls at the Oceanside group sites have been replaced with concrete buildings and real doors. Sure there’s no electricity or hot water but it feels much classier.
• Jeffrey and his magical packing powers once again defeated us and despite our own personal best time for departing Assateague on Sunday morning (8:36 am), their car rolled out before ours. I blame my busted foot for forcing me to limp my luggage between the tent and the car…

Darrenism-a-Day 2008

Darrenisms abound. Perhaps it is because I’ve fallen behind on my blog, or maybe Darren is making them deliberately in an attempt to reclaim the #1 ranking (thanks to a link in a DC art forum, Darrenisms have fallen behind my Artomatic post), but I think the reason for the recent Darrenism surge is simple: I’ve hired a new assistant to track Darrenisms. Darren thinks of Sara as his girlfriend but really that is her secondary role, her primary responsibility is to inform me of any new Darrenisms that slip out. I believe she has caught the last nine of them, so clearly we have the right woman for the job(s).

As a result of this new arrangement (and my tardiness in posting as Sara reported them) we can now celebrate this week with the inaugural Darrenism-a-Day campaign! These Darrenisms run the gamut from the original word-mash Darrenism (e.g. Astrocity) to celebrity Darrenisms, mixed idiom Darrenisms, and we’ll even be introducing slang Darrenisms.

To start things off we’ll show that Darren doesn’t limit his Darrenisms to the English language and will happily skewer some Hawai’ian words as well… each day’s Darrenism can be found at the bottom of the Darrenism archive (to ensure that it regains the lead from the Artomatic post!)

Two-bing

Two speeding tickets, two rainstorms, and two hours longer than usual on the river... and we had a great time. Like they say, even bad tubing is still pretty good... or is that something else.



Notes to Jon:

• Bring a mini-squeegee for the lens on Darren's waterproof (but clearly not fog proof) camera.
  
  
• Watch out for the Rappahannock County "toll booth" on Rt. 211 between Warrenton and Sperryville. It's generally hidden behind a hill just inside the county line. 66% of our caravan paid a visit. At least Mary and I have the same court date if we decide to make a day out of it. Happy Fourth of July officer...
  
  
• When sunglasses get sacrificed to the river (as they have on at least four of our trips), immediately look at the banks to get a bearing of where they were dropped. With your face close to the river you can see the bottom so if you note the general area you'll be able to get them back. I didn't do that this time and hence my once flawless record of sunglasses recovery has now dropped to 2-2. I did however recover two pairs of sunglasses that previous tubers had dropped, so overall we have dropped 4 pairs and recovered 4 pairs. Which leads me to...
  
  
• Sunglasses that have been in the river for a little while really smell like fish... and it's entirely possible that disturbing their sacrifices angers the river gods enough for them to call down their rainstorm wrath.
  
  
• It took the rainstorm about 10 seconds to move across the river, so we had plenty of time after hearing the screams of the first victims on the far bank to watch the rain splashes make their way inexorably toward us.
  
  
• Don't tie all 11 tubes together to float down the river unless you don't care that it will take six hours (at normal water height).
  
  
• This year the trip was from mile marker 16 to 19. A little way after marker 17 is a rope swing and "rapids". The river was slowest between marker 17 and 18, and fairly fast (maybe 45 minutes) between 18 and 19.
  
  
• We met at 7:30 and were on the road with the coolers arranged and packed with ice shortly after 8, but due to an extra pickup at the Vienna metro our car wasn't back on 66 until 8:50... and we managed to pull into Shenandoah River Outfitters at 10:31 (despite about a 5 minute stop at the "toll booth"). On the way home we left about 6 and got back to Arlington at 8:10, which gave us just enough time to shower and bike down to Iwo Jima to see the fireworks. Of course we had a much more luxurious view this year thanks to Kristin's parents roof deck (thank you!)
  
  

Ba'rack Climbing in Franklin, WV

I missed out on Jeff's Obama fundraiser but it was worth it for a perfect day of climbing out in Franklin, WV. My two month layoff definitely showed as I had to "take" on Belly of the Whale and realized I wasn't ready to lead Jump Start but I made it up both and I felt great flashing Anchors Away. Most importantly my finger and foot injuries weren't a problem, so I am all clear to get out and do some more climbing!

Hail Deer

Depending on whether it takes deer longer to eat dinner than it takes our family, we saw between 48 and 66 deer tonight. You see, having lost the past two deer counting games by guessing way too low (20), I went into this game with the highest deer count of the family (45). Not coincidentally, this year the car (with me at the helm) took an unorthodox route that went past Big Meadows (dining spot of a large number of deer) both on the way to dinner and on the way home. We saw 18 deer in the meadow area on the way to dinner and well over 20 on the way home. It's not entirely clear how many of those seen on the way home were just the same slow eaters we saw on the way in, hence the controversy between 48 and 66 deer. Either way my 45 deer guess was the closest...

EXCEPT that in a completely unprecedented move, my father (whose day we were belatedly celebrating) used his celebratory powers to award Mimsi a second guess (as a purported bonus for having spotted the first deer) and so at dinner she revised her initial guess of 20 up to the winning guess of 50. I am filing a protest.

The family is also filing a protest against Aramark which is attempting to ruin this family tradition by drastically reducing the quality of our dinner (I'll save the full review for the notes). Although I haven't figured out how yet, I also believe Aramark is responsible for the intense hail storm that forced us to pull off the Drive for a few minutes. Their plan was foiled however when the weather cleared up by the most important point of the trip when we stop to say hello to our grandparents at Cresent Rock overlook. And as you can see from the count, the hail certainly didn't scare the deer away...

Notes to Jon:

• Deer Game Results
  
• Mimsi (20)
• Mom (33)
• Dad (41) ... and 2 bears
  
• Jon (45)
• Mimsi #2(!) (50)*
• Actual (48 to 66) ... and zero bears (sorry Dad).
  

• Even more controversy on the deer count when Mom and Mimsi tried to include deers 67 and 68 which we saw just outside the entrance for Skyline Drive. As stated last year, deer outside the park do not count. For clarity that statement needs to be revised to "Deer outside of Skyline Drive do not count" since technically the park doesn't end until a sign at the bottom of the mountain, even though the game (in my mind at least) has always ended once we pass the Ranger station.
  

• For the second year in a row we have been noticeably unimpressed with the food at Big Meadows. They have taken the menu and price upscale, while the serving size and (most importantly) taste has gone downhill. Worst of all they are starting to run out of things, including the most important dish of all: their Blackberry Ice Cream Pie. They were also out of the gumbo I ordered. The Brunswick Stew was a small $20 crock which consisted mostly of a large dry chicken leg. The Sheppard's Pie had an unusual flavor, but not necessarily in a good way. My Ratatouille was decent and the New Deal Turkey which my mom always orders was smaller and with less stuffing than usual (but at least it was still on the menu). They reminded me that I hated the Creme Brule there, so I tried the Bread Pudding which was ok, and probably a bigger hit than the Blackberry Ice Cream sundaes. Next trip we'll try Skyland for dinner. On the bright side, we got a seat by the window for the first time :-)

Artomatic final floors! ...a week too late

I'm pretty sure nobody was waiting on my review before checking out floors 4-6 at Artomatic, but if you were I apologize because well, the show ended last week. These floors had plenty of great individual work but I wasn't captivated by an entire exhibit the way I was by Chris Peloso and Tracey Lee on my first trip or Heather Bartlett and Patrick Wilson on my second. But there was still plenty of art that interested me:

John Pack had a whole series of mouth-watering food creations made entirely of sea debris. The ice cream and toppings were various corals and the cone was a seashell. Elizabeth Lundberg Morisette put together my favorite installation in 1,584 Bottles of Beer on the Wall (I've had my share). It was a testament to her grandfather "Sarge" who gave up drinking cold turkey at age 60 (saying "I've had my share") and who left her two coffee cans full of nails which were used to nail 1,584 not-necessarily-beer bottle caps to the wall (several were from my favorite IBC root beer)

I previously joked that BRASH was putting a poem up for every artist. I believe I have to revoke the joke. As far as I could tell, by my final trip on closing weekend BRASH had left a poem for all 1,000+ artists. Amazing. Congratulations. One of my favorites was her interpretation of Sabrina Cabada's Outside Looking In. I believe it was a fairly different interpretation than what Sabrina intended, but it made the piece for me. BRASH also had a great poem for another of my favorite pieces called Roadmap to Spring by Susan W. Holland. The trunk and branches of the tree are all made by exposing the bottom layer of the painting to reveal a map of the DC area.

For the most part I don't tend to be a fan of abstract art. Kay Layne and Pilar Jimenez's work was an exception for me. I think I liked Kay's work because the titles gave me a concept I could grasp onto. The subject of her painting was a simple red square (or should I say Krasnaya Ploshad! yukyukyuk). In the case of Corralled there were some circles surrounding the red square and as you can see on the left, here the red square is Waiting in Line. I have no idea what appealed to me about Pilar's work but it did. Maybe the background reminded me of a photo I had just accidentally taken of the concrete floor? Nope I have no idea.

While I wasn't sucked in for quite as long as I had been upstairs, two artists did have a number of different works that appealed to me. JD Yezierski had a series of photographs of nudes "painted" with projected images. I love the three-dimensionality that this gave to Mona's eyes. Other humorous ones included Ass on Ass with a projection of Rummy, and Jerry Fal-well endowed which I imagine you can also picture. Finally Nancy Daly had a broad range of fun pieces: from her commentary on men and women with strategically placed hearts, to a rolling office chair made entirely of post-its, and from a "Support our oops" photo of a burned out neon sign, to a blue bower bed with clever story which asks the question "Are good things a good enough replacement for good genes?"

Looking back, the highlight of the show for me was Tracey Lee's Refused: Return to Sender which used several pieces to tell the heartbreaking story of her relationship with her alcoholic parents. What I may remember most from this Artomatic experience though was getting so much feedback from the artists to my first blog post, and especially finding out Joseph Merchlinsky had made my favorite piece from 2004. Now if I can just figure out who made the Converse sneaker color study from the year before...

While I begin the wait until the next Artomatic and Darren and I continue to debate our mantle options I'll be keeping my eyes open for a glance like Cristin's...

The 500 Club at Fenway South

We’ve got it easy. Jump on the Baltimore-Washington Parkway, grab free parking (or worst case $2), buy cheap food from the vendors in front of Pickles Pub, and scalp prime seats to the game for well less than face value. That’s the routine for most of the nine games that the Sox play here at Fenway South each season. Really I feel bad for the fans in Boston, the families we meet at each game who have realized they can fly the whole family down for a weekend of Sox games in Charm City for less than it would cost them to stay at home and watch. That’s the great thing about Fenway South, it’s not just geographically-challenged fans like Jeffrey and me making the O’s feel like they have 9 extra road games a year, the seats around us are usually filled with extended families of vacationing New Englanders. Ironically, I’m pretty sure we get to see more Sox games than they do each year.

I got an early start on my Sox watching this year with the trip in April to Yankee Stadium. That was quite an experience. I was in section 39 of the bleachers out in right field. It’s the home of the “Bleacher Creatures” and many of the Yankee fans there wore “Section 39” t-shirts. The “Roll Call” originates in this section, where the fans chant each player’s name during the top of the first inning until they get some acknowledgment from that player and move on to the next. The few Sox fans (at our game exactly 4 in the whole section) are generally welcomed with a collective chant of “Ass-Hole… Ass-Hole” as we walk to our seats (or in any way move around or draw attention to ourselves). When YMCA plays on the sound system, they encircle a Sox fan and sing “Why are you gay?” Nonetheless, I proudly wore my Sox cap the entire time.

That’s not as bold as it seems because of one important development in recent years: the bleachers are now alcohol-free. The Yankee fans I was with told me stories of the good old days when a Sox fan would be ruthlessly confronted by the chanting fans and often kicked out of the bleachers by security “for their own safety”. The situation has mellowed and I never felt any genuine hostility. That’s probably because I was with several Yankees fans, cheered for the Sox but not excessively loudly, and because two vocal Sox fans a few rows in front of me did an excellent job of drawing all the wrath in their direction. At one point the fan behind me tapped me on my back and asked “How is it that everyone is leaving you alone?” Even the Ass-Hole chant I got en route to my seat died half-heartedly after a couple of rounds. Even still I was a bit nervous as Joel took a photo of me after the game in front of the Yankees logo… giving a big thumbs down. With some drunken Yanks fans around I’d likely have been taking a rather different route out of (well over) the bleachers. It probably helped my cause that the Damn Yankees had crushed my Sox that night and everyone (but me) was feeling festive… But scoreboard aside it was a fun trip to Yankee Stadium and I thank Joel for organizing it. I especially enjoyed learning about the boltbus service which I rode home from Penn Station NYC to Metro Center D.C. for $15 (it could have been $1 if I booked far enough in advance)

I expected a better result for the Sox on May 13^th at the Fenway South season opener. After all Jeffrey and I had never witnessed a Sox defeat there since our tradition began a couple of years ago. I should have known something was amiss when we had to pay face value for our tickets ($50/$50 for Sec. 34 Row JJ Seat 5 - Home Plate) and for once there actually seemed to be a few more Orioles fans than Red Sox fans (quite literally, we usually outnumber them considerably). Beckett got shelled, Manny stayed stuck on 498 HRs, and—other than it marking our first defeat—the most memorable thing about the game was that someone had followed through on the idea of a Fenway South poster that Jeffrey and I had often discussed but never executed.

Two weeks later the Sox were back in town on Friday May 30^th. I made the mistake of assuming that $55 tickets would have to be good seats and snagged them for $20 a piece ($55/$20 Sec. 43 Row J Seat 8 - Press Box). They weren’t horrible (behind home plate next to the press boxes) but they were considerably farther away than we were used to. I did determine that it is easier to scalp tickets for the weekend games for some reason as there were far more sellers in the designated scalping area than there had been for our Tuesday night game on the 13^th. Our seats may have been worse but the results were much better. It took 13 innings but the Sox finally broke it open and Papelbon locked down the 5-2 win… probably because by that time we had moved all the way down to the second row behind the plate. After managing only a single HR in the past two weeks, Manny was still stuck on #499 and stayed that way through this game.

We nearly skipped Saturday’s game. The forecast was for storms and Sarah was having a dinner party. We went anyway. We might not have forgiven ourselves if we didn’t. The evening started well, with second row seats just past third base for $30 ($32/$30 Sec. 62 Row BBB Seat 8 - 3rd Base), and it kept getting better. No rain ever came, the Sox won again, and everything was completely overshadowed by Manny finally crushing HR #500 in front of as noisy a crowd as he’d have found at Fenway (North). After taking photos of nearly every pitch Manny had seen for the past two days, the one pitch he finally got a hold of turned out to be the one that my focally-challenged camera managed to blur. But we were there for the memorable moment, probably the most historic sports moment Jeffrey or I have witnessed (though I did see Big Mac’s final four homers in his record-setting 1998 campaign—that might have won out had Barry not broken* that record only a few years later). Fans were so excited we were literally clamoring for the ball girl to toss us the piece of trash that Manny had dropped on his way into the dugout (we assumed it was a sunflower seed bag or somesuch—the zoom on my camera revealed it was only a crushed muddy cup that had gotten stuck to his cleat)

At this moment the Sox hold the best record in the AL East with a 7 game lead over the last place Os and Yankees. Hopefully that’s how things will look at Fenway South when the Sox return to finish the season series in the middle of August. Until then, Go Sox!